


I Won't Mind

by zalacious



Series: The Lonely Hearts Club [1]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Emotions, M/M, One Shot, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-09
Updated: 2017-07-09
Packaged: 2018-11-29 23:04:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11450919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zalacious/pseuds/zalacious
Summary: On March 25th 2015 Zayn Malik left One Direction





	I Won't Mind

"How would you describe Harry?"

"How would I describe Harry, uhhhm..." Zayn scratched the back of his neck and shifted in his seat so that he was in a more comfortable position. "He's very genuine. What you see is what you get. There's no airs and graces about him, y'know?"

"Your best friend."

"Yea." Zayn cracked a smile. "He's great. He's funny, super nice to like, everyone."

"You guys became fast friends?"

"Well, yea. Like I said, he's nice to everyone. When we met and got to chatting, it was like we had known each other for years. Like, I'm not the most extroverted person so I don't really just put myself out there and just make friends as easily as he does. We're also similar in some of things we do, how we were raised, what we like."

"Do you miss him?"

"... Yea. I do."

"What do you miss?"

"Our friendship. All of it. How we met, became friends, learnt things about each other at like, two in the morning when neither of us could go to sleep." Zayn cleared his throat when he realised just how deep in his feelings he was becoming.

I missed so much about Harry.

His eyes  
His smile  
His dimples  
His laugh

How he would wrap his arms around my waist so securely and bury his face into my neck. The late night conversations we would have... How those same conversations led to our first kiss.

_We laid on my hotel room floor with pillows surrounding us. We had had a long day and just wanted to have a quiet night before we both went to bed. We loved talking to each other about anything and everything. At one point we could be talking about utter nonsense, laughing until tears formed in Harry's eyes and my stomach tightened. Another time we could exchange soft whispers about the meaning of life and the universe and delve into the depths of our mind that no one else was allowed entry into besides each other._

_After our laughter had died down, Harry turned to look at me. My eyes remained glued to the ceiling until I felt his pair of green eyes on me. I turned and smiled at Harry who returned it. A comfortable silence now hung around us._

_Harry's hands were intertwined together on his chest. His thumbs gently pushing against each other. He inched ever so slightly towards me and I found myself mimicking his moves. Our eyes stayed glued to each others'. Green and Gold, watching as if everything was in slow motion, only taking a second to glance down at the slightly parted pink lips that awaited the touch of the other._

_It's a soft and gentle peck. Harry's eyes immediately shut as soon as our lips lock while I kept mine open a bit longer.. just looking at the sight before me before my eyes gently flutter close._

_It was your cliché first kiss. Tentative. Testing the waters type thing, but very nice._

_"What was that for?" Zayn asked and Harry shrugged._

__

_"Just ... felt like kissing you." Harry whispered back honestly._

We both found the other insanely good looking, very intriguing, very nice and easy to get along with.  
Over time, the kissing got more frequent but stayed at the same pace. Slow and innocent. Until one night when alcohol got involved.

_"I just want to kiss your face." Harry mumbled into Zayn's ear and stroked his thigh in the car._

_"At the hotel." Zayn smirked back._

_Everything was hazy at the moment and it all felt like a dream.  
Harry struggled with removing his thin knit sweater, that night, drunk off of his arse. What I like about him is that he's still the same even when he's drunk. It's not like he'd act like he's someone else when he's sober. He's still as goofy and clumsy as ever... maybe a bit softer and slower in his movements, but it's still Harry_.

_"Stop laughing." Harry himself chuckled and fell forward._

_"Come here." Zayn sat up and grabbed the edge of Harry's sweater and once it was up and over his head, Harry fell on Zayn, immediately connecting their lips together. That night more than just kissing happened and ever since then I just couldn't keep my hands off of him. I just wanted to show him all the time how much I liked being around him._

It was fun for the both of us and not serious - not in the beginning at least. We didn't take much seriously back then. Almost everything was impulsive and jovial. The giving and receiving of attention was nice

"I Won't Mind is a pretty deep song, isn't it?"

"Yea, ha. It is. I really wanted to just get it off my chest and once I got to writing, I didn't stop until I was finished."

"It's a love song, right?"

"You can say that. I like hearing about how people interpret my songs before I let them into my mind on the background of all of it. What it means, who it's about, all of that stuff."

"If you let them in at all. You are the mysterious one after all. It could also be a struggle with fame, maybe?"

"Maybe." Zayn smiles.

It's my little secret.

Harry brought something out in me. Something no one else was able to bring out in me and something I'd never show to anyone else besides Harry.  
You see that's what happens when you're thrown into something you never thought possible in your wildest imagination with a complete stranger. You're forced to spend all this time together, during which you learn so much about them.

What they like  
What they dislike  
What makes them tick  
What they like about you  
How they do certain things  
What their routine is like

A relationship sprouted between us. We found comfort in each other and both grew from being incredibly sensitive teens to strong, confident boys (not that there's anything wrong with being sensitive).

A voice at the back of my head told me that this wouldn't be a 'forever' type of love.  
Harry loved me but, it wouldn't last (it was a type of fling, you could say). Harry found love with other people and it was real with them as well and although it was hard to accept, I understood it. I always joke and say that his heart is bigger than his body because he's always so willing and ready to give a piece of it to so many people that come into his life - even if they don't stay for long, they'll always have a piece of him, and he doesn't mind it because he's a nice guy like that.

I wore my heart on my sleeve and even though I knew nothing would come of this, I wanted to try anyway - wanted to believe.

I was a fool for Harry in every sense of the way.

Harry loved me too, I know he did but he wanted to have fun with others as well. It was only when things were too late that he realised just how much he loved me and told me... But by then, like I said, it was too late. He didn't want to risk his heart and get hurt, so he decided to let me go.

"I like you. A lot."

"So do I, Zayn."

"But it's never going to go anywhere."

".... I know. It's hard...but just having you be around and, here is enough for me."

"Maybe we can rekindle it in another life." Zayn laughed sadly.

"Meet me on the other side?" Harry smiled softly.

"I'm already there."

Our love was blind. Often unspoken but it was there. In a look, a touch, certain words. 'Drive safe, look after yourself, etcetera.'

"Why are you leaving?"

"I can't do this anymore. It's not what I wanted. I told you this a long time ago."

"Why now?"

"I'm hurting. It's just gotten too much for me to handle."

"Nothing's going to be the same without you."

"I know. I'm sorry...."

"Don't apologise. I want you to be okay."

"I'll love you forever, Harry. I promise. Nothing will ever change what we went through and what I felt for you. I know we can't be together and the pain hurts, but I'd do it all over again with you from beginning to end if it means reliving those moments together because they hold such a special place in my heart. You hold such a special place in my heart and always will."

Harry cried silently on the other end of the line. In truth, he would relive everything again too.

"I love you too. Goodbye, Zayn."

×××

_I Won't Mind will always be for Harry as MITAM will always be for Zayn -whether or not they listen to it, it will always be there_

 _×××_


End file.
